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« goodtimesgo » TEXT ✧ AUDIO ✧ VIDEO ✧ ACTION Connor Murphy ✦ Dear Evan Hansen
RESIDENCE ✦ Jackdaw Ranch
GEMBOND ✦ Sapphire
Dear Evan Hansen, we've been way too out of touch.
Things have been crazy and it sucks that we don't talk that much.

INFO ✧ PERMISSIONS ✧ KINKLIST

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text; turntechGodhead (cw; for some description of bodily harm)

[chumpelstiltskin]

[After a clumsy descent from a tall building, Dave isn't in great shape. He's reasonably sure he did not stick his landing, based on the pain in his ankle. It sort of pales in comparison to the fact that he feels like he just got face fucked with ghost peppers.

His throat burns right down to what feels like the pit of his stomach. What he had previously identified as laboured breathing from running like hell is now ostensibly caused by whatever was in that gas based on the fact that he can taste blood. He looks down at his hands and his skin is burning, raw marks on his exposed palms. He feels prickles under his clothes that suggest it's much the same elsewhere on him.

The route from the building back to his apartment is simple, but he's already disoriented and lost. His goal has shifted from "run the fuck away" to "I need to get these clothes off me and get in a shower" to "oh, I might actually die and I don't know what 911 is here".

Even in this state as he slumps down against a wall (wishing he'd picked a more populated area to try die in) he deliberately skips past Bro in his phone and makes a very quick decision on who he's going to call. Ceej is a pretty safe bet. They got pretty close having a kid together and then losing it, right?

He opens up a message and reads his own writing in front of him:
hey daddy

[He does not remember sending that. Oh god. He's hallucinating. His eyes are burning and the brightness of his screen is mocking him.]

you up?
jk
SOS
sorry
i mean it
SOS


[He drops a pin to his location.]

[yourattention]

[Connor hasn't seen Dave in several days, owing to the fact that sometimes ghosting is self care. Or at least Connor thinks it's self care. Actually, it's probably the opposite and he should stop doing it whenever he has anything resembling an emotion, even if that emotion is complicated trauma about family you thought you were over until your ugly plant baby nearly died.

Point is, Connor spends like thirty seconds staring down at his screen and debating pretending like he didn't see it. Unfortunately, he can hear tension in the music and he's never been good at ignoring the more direct attempts of the music trying to communicate with him. So he takes a flashpoint to where Dave is and... ah. He figured it would be some dumb shit he could fix with a few lines of song, maybe a desperate attempt at curing loneliness, but this is kind of beyond that which only leaves...

He really needs to stop making out with boys only when there's healing involved.]

I lied about mouth-to-mouth. Yes or no?

[Connor kneels, tucking his hair behind his ear and looking down at Dave.]

[chumpelstiltskin]

[What is probably an appropriately swift reaction time for Connor just seems like eons to Dave here with nothing to focus on except the pain he's feeling and the fear that whoever caused it isn't actually finished yet.

He's having some troubling thoughts about this being a terrible way to test if he'll die here and a feeling of dread starts to slowly creep over him.

As such, he is so relieved to see Ceej that he could cry (but he won't). Instead he just limply tilts his head to look up at him, it's at an angle where it's apparent his eyes are not just regular red but painful red as well.

He has some sort of smart ass come back for that but when he tries to say it he coughs, again like some sort of sad crippled boy from classic literature. He shrugs his shoulders, pressing his lips into a thin line in an effort to obscure the fact that he is in a lot of pain and feels extremely vulnerable about it.]

I don't think-- probably not just CPR training is gonna fix it.

[yourattention]

I'm multifaceted and I can heal you but we need to sync to do it. Yes or no?

[The slight edge in his voice is back, probably familiar to Dave after nearly
a week spent basically living together. He'll do a lot of things without explicit consent, but this isn't one of them if Dave's coherent enough to make the decision. If he has to pull tricks to get that consent, then whatever. He will.]

dream bubbles

[broyonce]

[ dirk doesn't pay much attention to the bubbles, not even when one pops on him. nothing happens so he just goes on with his day, going back out to look for a place to buy some supplies he'd forgotten on his first runs.

but the twin bubble must pop on someone else, because everything fades away and what's left is...

... it's viscerally familiar is what it is. dirk hasn't been here in about... thirteen years. he fell off the map when dave showed up. but here it is, just like always, and he's sitting at the bar with a beer next to him and a drag queen -- his partner, he realizes, at the time, is standing in front of him, fussing over a split lip with a wet napkin. it's still obviously dirk but he doesn't have a hat on, has his shades on the top of the bar, and he's leaner, skinny, tightly wound but a little looser than he normally is. maybe it's the beers.

you're going to get killed one of these days, she says, and dirk laughs, wincing when it stretches the cut and makes it start bleeding again. it feels too real, and things like reality are slipping away into the back of his mind. ]

I'm not going to die until later. I have a while left yet.

[ he sounds so sure of himself, and she sighs and starts dabbing at a cut on his head too. you didn't have to do that, anyway she finally adds, then shakes her head. that eye's gonna bruise, darling, but you're still handsome.

the laugh this time is a little reedy, and the tips of his ears turn pink even in the low light. ]

[yourattention]

[One moment he's in the park, hanging out in a tree like usual, and the next he's in the bathroom of... somewhere? Looking in the mirror, he blinks. His hair's been done up like Lup used to, when they would hang around and get high. Further checking reveals he's been redressed too, the relatively masculine clothes Dirk has mostly seen him in replaced with a skirt that's probably more color than Connor's worn in years and a shirt and it's... fine? He owns these clothes, he just wasn't wearing them a moment ago and that feels off somehow. Exiting the bathroom, Connor scans the bar? This is a bar, which means this isn't his dream. Drinking is Larry's vice, not his.

He doesn't recognize anyone at first until he looks over the bar again and sees Dirk talking to... someone. He doesn't know if he's supposed to recognize her, but Connor crosses the room anyway and touches Dirk's shoulder.]

There you are. Aren't you going to introduce me?

[broyonce]

[ dirk's clothes are different too, when connor spots him. the polo is gone, replaced with a black tank top, and every goddamn scar, even the ones at his collarbones and upper chest, are visible. there's a ton of them, of course, but he doesn't seem put out by them.

she's got her hand on dirk's arm when connor approaches, and she arches an eyebrow when he touches dirk's shoulder. to dirk's credit he doesn't jump, but he looks back at connor and... things don't tie together, for a moment.

something's wrong, but he can't place it. his head tilts one way, then the other, then like everything's slotted into place, he speaks. ]

This is Ginger. Ginger, this is Connor.

[ he's not smiling, but when does he ever? ginger squeezes his arm and continues on for him, a pleasure. now, dirk, you're not leaving me for a younger model, are you? her tone is teasing and dirk's ears burn even hotter. ]

Don't be silly, darlin'.

[yourattention]

[I'm dating his brother, actually is on the tip of his tongue, but he doesn't say it. That's not true and... Connor doesn't mind lying, but that? That's a statement with too many lies in it. None of it's true.]

We're just friends. I look after his kid brother sometimes, you know? [That's the worst way to put "I platonically daddy his young brother" but oh well! Can't take it back now.] And him, when he's being stubborn.

[Connor's hand moves for Dirk's shoulder to gently ruffle his hair. He would never do that outside of this dream, but he's trying to sell the fact that they're friends and he's not a guy who patched Dirk up in his own bathroom a few hours after making out with his brother. Normally, he'd try to break out of a dream as quickly as possible but here? Here, he wants to know more.]

note left at not-Denny's

[inlutilis]

Ceej! Do you know how to bake a birthday cake?!
I have an important business offer for you!
Okay, maybe not super important, but I could really use your help, I can even pay!
Please get back to me!
[ There's a number attached.... and a small drawing of a circle with two dots for eyes and a large grinning mouth, and "Emil" written next to it. In case he needed a reminder. ]

[yourattention]

[Your little friend left you a note, Ivy says when he gets back from his lunch break. I left it on the table in the break room.

He doesn't actually get around to responding until a couple hours after that, after he's off work for the day.]

this is cj
i can make a birthday cake why

[inlutilis]

[ 'Emil is typing...' means Emil is excited and has a lot to say. ]

Oh hey! I hope work went well!
So much happened since we met and I have a million questions about how you're doing but let me get to the thing I needed to ask you first.
I think it's going to be my friend's birthday soon and I wanted to do something special for him.
I don't have a kitchen.... and I don't know how to bake anything. But I can learn! And you're the only one I know who works somewhere that serves food!
It's asking a lot. But do you want to try baking together?

[yourattention]

sure you can come over to my place n ill teach you

[Then, after a moment:]

not right now i dont have the shit for a cake right now i dont bake cake that often

text; sent at like 3am

[chumpelstiltskin]

you up

[yourattention]

i already told you that you can skip the first five steps of this conversation and just come over

[chumpelstiltskin]

its different this time

[yourattention]

text ; notflatearth

[escardos]

so how’s your crush? o v o)

[yourattention]

did you mean to send this to me because ive been getting misfires all day and i keep not replying to them bc i dont fuckin know half the ppl texting me and im not about to tell them i got their sext

[escardos]

of course it’s for you? why would i ever sext you? what part of this is a sext? are you that desperate for dave? o ^ o)?

[ thE BURN ]

text. un: theseusTremefied.

[broyonce]

how's ginger?

[yourattention]

you wanna come over and find out?

[Then, like a full minute later:]

wait do you even have the code for the flashpoint outside my house

[broyonce]

[ wow, eager. ]

i would need that first, yes.

[action]

[chumpelstiltskin]

[Dave is complicit in a day or two of the silent treatment. Mostly because he has a lot of thoughts to sort out and then because he thinks Connor is mad. It leads to some revelations about himself, about his insecurities, about how at any moment one of them could just go home and when he thinks about that he knows he'd regret so much about how things have played out so far.

And then things get freaky when he's texting Connor and not getting answers. Fed up, he decides to just go to his stupid farm and talk it out in person like he should do anyway. He has a lot he needs to tell him to his face.

Blessedly, he escapes the notice of Puff but doesn't get a response when he knocks on the door. He knows how to break in well enough, but there's an eerie silence in the house and it fills him with dread-- but Connor is definitely here.

After padding around calling for him, he's about to assume he's just not in and try again later when he remembers one of the many strange and random factoids he knows about Connor. Sometimes, he just likes to be underwater.

Dave wanders out to the pool, leaning cautiously over it he's sure he sees something..or someone sitting in it. He crouches on his hands and knees and leans over again. Can he hear him if he calls? Probably not. Dave opts to just.. splash his hand gently on the surface of the pool.]

[yourattention]

[At first, Connor only means to stay underwater for a few hours. He tries not to stay in the water for too much longer than that unless he's sleeping—and he does sometimes just sleep in the pool or the bathtub, because it's safe. Water is always safe.

Except this time he can't leave.

It's like claustrophobia, the way that every time he tries to get out of the water he feels ill. The drier he gets, the more breathing feels like a struggle. Air burns as he inhales, and it feels a lot like the first few hours of monster week every month when his lungs are rearranging themselves to make use of the gills that sprout. He can't even tell how long he's been at the bottom of the pool because at some point he lost track of time.

There's a ripple on the surface, and he assumes it's Ginger. He taught her to nudge the water if she needs something while he's down there, because otherwise he spends way longer in the water than he should. He surfaces, eyes barely above the water, and oh. It's Dave.

He did say they could have a conversation when Dave got his shit together. Apparently it's together, which is either good or bad timing depending on what version of the conversation they're about to be having.

Coming up out of the water just enough to rest his arms on the edge of the pool, Connor looks up at Dave. The same eerie silence that was in the house is still here at the edge of the pool, even though Connor is present.]

Did you come to break up with me?

[He means that. Dave knows him well enough that he can probably tell that it's a genuine question, not a bad attempt at a joke. At the time he hadn't really reacted to Noiz saying or are u mad that he wants to kiss me and not you but it's just been there, bouncing around in his head. He wasn't lying when he said he was more mad that apparently Noiz could seduce John and didn't get warned off but Dave made sure to tell him that John was straight. That fact, however, doesn't preclude the fact that he's also mad that Dave was probablyonly going to pick one of them.

Of course Dave, who was in a monogamous relationship with Karkat despite troll culture not really being built that way, would pick between them.Or neither of them, although Connor thinks that's less likely just... given the way this place works. So of course Connor would lose even though Noiz is literally, in all ways, a worse choice. He's not the one who asked for something Dave apparently wasn't willing to give. He wouldn't ever ask Dave for something stupid like a label to the thing they've been building for an entire year.

Distantly, like the faded whisper of a memory:

you're not yourself
you're not what he wants
you're someone in-between...]

[chumpelstiltskin]

[If Dave were dumber, he might suggest that you can't dump someone you were never dating. He's not dumb, though. Not that dumb. He won't fall into that very obvious trap, he moves past it.]

No. I wanted to see you.

[He points out, matter-of-factly. He extends a hand toward Connor, gently brushing aside his wet hair from his face as he does. It is an extremely tentative gesture, as if he's very afraid he's going to be smacked away.]

And you told me to come talk to you when I got my shit together, so here I am.