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Noted.

[ he lets his hand brush over his hair then, nails briefly tipping down into his scalp before they relent again. he drops it back to his side, for now. ]

That's fine. Not bothered by it.

[ it's not a dig or anything, that's just the way he talks. ]

[Connor swallows down the noise he wants to make when Dirk touches him. He likes being touched, when it's expected. When he knows it's going to happen. It's one of the reasons why he likes sex with people who don't care a lot about him: they won't try to touch him, when it's over.

Slowly and deliberately enough for Dirk to stop him if he wants, Connor reaches for the waistband of Dirk's pants.]

For the record, I rescind my previous statement. I'm willing, as long as you are. You don't even need to buy me dinner afterward, I'll blow you for free.

Edited 2021-06-06 03:44 (UTC)

[ dirk is a quiet fuck, overall: he likes his partners to be loud as hell, but he's not loud himself. not making noises comes easily to him, though. he almost never talked at all while dave was growing up--at least while cal had hold of him.

but that was then and this is now. he's said more in a month than he'd said in years before that. it means something, probably.

but being quiet during this kind of thing is just him, nothing put upon him.

back to the moment at hand. ]

Fortunately, I'm not a buying dinner afterward kind of guy. This can be what it is. I'm not going to get weird about it if you don't.

[ he's not stopping connor's hands as he speaks. ]

I can do that.

[Connor undoes Dirk's pants, fingers immediately slipping under the waistband of his boxer briefs and seeking out the shape of Dirk with featherlight touches. It's been... a while? It's been a while, because he's spent a lot of the past three years just trying to survive, so he takes a moment to center himself before pulling the waistband down to free Dirk's cock. Connor leans forward, intending to make good on the promise of a blowjob before pausing and looking up at Dirk through his lashes.]

You can pull my hair as long as you don't pull it out.

[Then he dips his head down to take the head of Dirk's cock into his mouth.]

[Connor's mildly afraid Dirk's just gonna bleed all over the floor and nothing will get cleaned up. He's not going to just, like, say that though. It would be rude, first of all, but second of all he feels like there's definitely a line that's been drawn between the two of them and he doesn't really... it feels weird to cross it, right now.]

It'll go faster if you let me clean this up and you go clean yourself up.

Glad we're in agreement.

[ he slouches a little as connor works at his pants, watching him through lidded eyes. it's a good sight, really; he has an appreciation for aesthetics (obviously), and this is already a good time.

he exhales a little louder at the first contact, slow. it's been a much longer time for him, though for different reasons. so he's attentive if nothing else; he nods in understanding at the ground rules.

he can follow rules. ]

Take it out of the braid, then.

[ his cock had already been stirring after connor had dropped down so smoothly in front of him, but with the attention it starts coming to attention a little faster: it hasn't been in a mouth in over a decade so perhaps it's a little overeager.

he's a big guy overall and his cock is proportionate, but he's a grower and not a shower, so welcome to that revelation as the moment continues. ]

[It takes Connor a moment to comply, because he's preoccupied with the overwhelming thought that he wants Dirk to fuck him. Not right now, because he's not stupid and he's aware that neither one of them has any of the necessary shit to make that a reality, but it's happening. His fingertips ghost over the piercings and it's not the first time he's seen something like them, but he's never seen this many at once. Connor's tongue briefly follows the path of his fingers along the underside of Dirk's cock, desperate for the idea of him. He'll buy actual lipstick if it gets him what he wants, even if he's not super fond of wearing it. He likes the way it looks, sometimes, but not the way it seems to get everywhere.

One of Connor's hands is busy on Dirk's cock, gently stroking, and he can't undo the knot in the leather cord he uses to tie his hair back with one hand. That was, maybe, an oversight on his part. Something to take note of for the future, because this is happening again in the future even if he has to manipulate his way into it. What he can do, though, is tug on the whole thing until it comes loose and then haphazardly unbraid it.

The rhythm of his hand on Dirk's cock barely falters while he does this, even if his mouth doesn't move. It's mostly because while he's coordinated to do the sex equivalent of patting his head and rubbing his stomach, he's not coordinated enough to do that while on a unicycle, so to speak. Once his hair is loose, Connor pulls off for just long enough to say:]

Use me.

[That said, Connor takes Dirk back into his mouth and sinks forward enough for his lips to meet the circle of his fingers.]

Edited (trent forgot important information about dirk's dick) 2021-06-07 00:26 (UTC)

oh....

[ One of the most earth-shattering things to happen to Emil in recent history had to do with transformation, so reading that CJ had gone through something that seemed even more awful than that hollows out a pit inside. He knows that there's a lot one person can't do about the past, and a small gesture like a cake doesn't erase any amount of scars.

Emil wishes he could help, even if he puts to the subject so casually. Connor might actually not think it's a big deal, or he might be brushing it all under the rug as a "tomorrow problem" like some other people he knows. They aren't close enough for him to feel it's his place to pry. He'll just have to get creative. ]

Maybe you could tell me sometime.
I've never even heard of god shit? I mean
back home, people have talked about demons and gods but it's not like you can walk up to one and shake hands, you know?

[Connor has the world's worst baseline for "what I will get upset about" and, essentially, unless the world is literally ending somehow he files it away under "sucks to suck" and shrugs it off. Well, he also gets upset when he has to have personal conversations, but that's a him problem. Is this healthy? Probably not! Is he going to keep doing it? Absolutely.]

sure i love talking about god shit all gods are bastards even my patron chac'lan but especially balance

all my homies hate balance

[Actually, all his homies hate Bliss. Connor specifically hates Balance for personal reasons.]

is that really their name? balance?
what does a god like that do? juggle?

[ This is an honest question. It's also a stupid one and deserves to be called as much. ]

no but i forget what their actual name is bc theyre a vagueblogging asshole thats just their domain or whatever

you know like sapphire is the god of friends and water and ruby is the god of sexy and fire and amethyst is the god of being the mom friend and air and emerald is the god of chilling the fuck out and also earth i guess

[He's trying to say that Balance is, quite literally, the god of Balance.]

I think I understand. people want to define what isn't familiar, yeah?
And if someone unfamiliar wants people to fear them or respect them, they just have to get defined as something they want.

[ Like that man who knew magic tricks, who had to "denounce god" for his magic. People force roles on other people, and even people they call gods just because they can do things they can't. And anyone who brings misfortune, well.... in his own experience, they call them demons. ]

Maybe balance isn't about anything but making sure enough people like him or her or.... or— [ He gets a little hung up here, for other reasons. ]

If you have so much power that you'd be called a god, why worry about that at all?

[ there's a pregnant pause. finally dirk sighs and puts the cloths he'd taken out on the counter and nods. ]

Fine.

[ he hesitates before adding: ]

Thank you.

thats the line between divinity and monstrosity

when someone with too much power stops caring about anything the apathy of power begins to create monstrosity and thats the difference between a god and a monster

[Then, like he didn't just swerve the conversation into a WILD direction:]

hey when you come over do you wanna watch a movie

sometimes people need power they don't have so
they make monsters to do what they can't.
do people make gods for the same reason?

[ was that a wild direction because that was completely on brand for his genre ]

you mean those moving pictures I heard about?
uh YEAH! that would be AWESOME!
I got a job so I could treat some of my friends from home to one, but then there were so many I didn't know what they'd like!

[ it's funny how a guy can go from staunchly refusing to even engage with flirting to sitting on his couch getting his dick sucked by a younger man. he thinks about that, briefly, but he's too busy thinking about connor's mouth on his cock to actually pay attention to that fact for very long.

once connor's hair is undone dirk's fingers curl in it, threading through the strands and gripping it. there's no soft moment from him, a careful acceleration: he holds tight from the get-go, nails briefly scratching over his scalp as he gets settled in.

by the time his cock is fully hard it's certainly of good size. a good size to fuck with. too bad it's not happening tonight. this will have to be enough for now. but if he's amenable to this, maybe he'll be amenable to a proper fuck later.

(he tells himself he won't, but he knows himself better.)

even though connor's mouth meets his fingers dirk takes the instruction to heart and uses his grip on his hair to push him a little further down, then urge him back again. if connor wants to be used, dirk can give him that. ]

Keep moving.

[He's expecting it, but being pushed down further still makes him gag around Dirk's cock. There's tears welling up in Connor's eyes, but he lets Dirk move him by his hair. When he was first growing it out in an act of teenage rebellion, girls told him it was getting shaggy, unkempt. It wasn't until he was on his knees in the concrete bathroom of a park, gagging on the cock of some other guy on the same wilderness retreat, he realized why he liked his hair longer.

You're such a pretty slut, the guy had said, taking my cock like you were made for it.

Like that, with someone's hand in his hair to keep him where they wanted, Connor had come, untouched, in his jeans. This is much the same. He does as Dirk asks, moving both his hand and mouth in time with Dirk's urging, and desperately wishes he was presumptuous enough to carry lube around all the time. Maybe he should start. Actually, he's going to start if Dirk lets him keep doing this. Like this, literally gagging for it, it's easy to think of the future. Of what he wants. Of next, next, next.

If he were any good at self-reflection, he might think about what that means. He's not, and he doesn't.]

i think gods are the physical manifestation of the desire for something to blame maybe? you know, if monsters are to represent the terrifying unknown then gods are also that in the opposite direction

anyway y we can netflix and chill or w/e while we're waiting for the cake to finish

[He's committed to the phrase "Netflix and chill" being platonic. He did this to himself, and yet.]

Don't mention it.

[Connor closes the gap between them again, wordlessly taking one of the cloths Dirk set on the counter, wetting it in the sink, and then kneeling again to get his Cinderella on. This is easy. This he knows how to do. It feels like the first normal thing he's done since Dave texted him, and he sinks into the repetitive nature of it without paying attention to anything else.

He should go. He should have gone, actually, but instead he focuses on making the floor as spotless as possible. If he just focuses on that, he doesn't have to think about the anxiety threatening to unspool in his chest.]

[ netflix? it isn't that hard for him to trace parts of words and make inferences based on other things he's seen and heard around noctium. radianet is the network. someone told him a movie is a flick. so maybe netflix is just movies you can watch on the network?

well, movies and chilling out sound like good ideas to him! ]

I'd really like that CJ! which one is your favorite?

there's this really weird movie where a couple of people fall into an old marilla beach movie and it's absolutely nonsense but i've watched it like three times

[Teen Beach Movie. He's describing Teen Beach Movie, but made by the native gems.]

idk tho there's action movies and stuff too i just like finding the weirdest things i can

[ Emil hasn't seen movies, he has no taste in movies, he might very likely be more taken by the novelty of movies and fail to realize that it's bizarre and nonsensical in a way only AlienDisneyChannel Teen Movies can be.

To think that Marilla Teen Beach Movie is going to be Emil's first introduction to cinema. ]

three times! okay, this I HAVE to see.
I don't care if it's weird, I want to know what kind of stuff you like! that's half the fun of being around your friends!
or maybe at least a third.

I won't.

[ dirk disappears a moment after that: he just sort of slinks off into the shadows, though his mental state is in more of a 'flash step away from whatever's going on' mode.

he heads to the bathroom to take a shower and toss his clothes in a garbage bag. he'll take that out later. he's gone a while, mostly because there's blood everywhere, and when he comes back out he's in lounge pants and a white long-sleeve shirt. there's no blood on it, so he must've taken care of his arm too.

he drops on the couch with a grunt, head tipping back toward the ceiling. ]

I'm getting slower.

[ he might just be projecting, but it feels that way. normally he would have been able to slice a guy into pieces before he could even react, but here he is, worse for wear because he was too slow. ]

Is it that you're slower or that your powers aren't working quite right?

[Connor's washing the rags when Dirk comes back out. The question is curious because he doesn't have very much reference when it comes to these sorts of things. His powers don't quite work right here either, but they're also so unwieldy that he's not noticing much of a difference in how he uses them. He knows that Dave had problems with his powers, though, and it stands to reason that if they're related, their powers might be related and under the same sorts of restrictions.

Then, very hesitantly:]

You might not have enough manna for it either.

[Can't wait for the inevitable moment where Emil questions why people are just singing and Connor has to be like "oh right, that's weird."]

is it? im not really a person who shares a lot about myself so i always kind of expect everyone else to feel the same

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it's getting hot in here so slap a nsfw warning on it

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